Disclaimer

This is dementia. It's not just a memory problem.
What you read in this blog is purely my own personal experience in dealing with Lewy Body Dementia every day.

This is not meant to offer any medical or legal advise.
I have no professional training in care giving or experiences in formal writing.
I'm just a woman that loves her husband deeply and wants to provide him with the best quality of life he can and chooses to have.
My prayer though this is "Lord, What am I learning from this; how can I use it help someone else and to glorify You?"
If just one person finds comfort in this public blog. I will feel like it was a success.

Saturday, September 24, 2011

Hubby's Personal Loss

On top of all of Lewy's problems that plague Hubby, Hubby has had some personally difficult days.
Hubby and I went to see a friend who was gravely ill in the hosp and after they moved friend to the Hospice wing. Time constraints and other responsibilities prevented us from visiting one more time, then it was too late.
Why do we always think we have one more day?

Hubby has taken the loss of his friend hard.
I'm at a loss to be able to console Hubby because his delusions have kept him angry at me.
Why would he want the comfort of someone that keeps him 'trapped' and 'steals from him'?
So I look at him sympathetically and speak soft and kind words.
It's the best I can do.

The visitation and funeral have been a lot for Hubby to process.
Tonight he is very very confused of day and time.
As I brought Hubby his supper he asked what day is was.
He repeated my "Saturday" response with a questioning tone.
I confirmed he was correct, it is Saturday.
He wanted to know why it was Saturday.
It just is, was the only answer I gave.
When I set his plate down, he couldn't understand why we were eating.
I explained it was time for supper but was having a difficult time getting him to understand what supper was.
Eventually he clicked and ate his supper

It breaks my heart that Hubby feels confused sad and alone.

I am in hopes that he will follow through on the advise of his social worker and attend the Sr Center and participate with others. Our plans to do this have failed twice. The most recent time, Hubby woke, ate breakfast, conversed with me and I gathered his shirts for transport to the cleaners. Hubby likes his shirts starched at the cleaners. He dressed and laid down and wouldn't wake up in time for us to leave.
Oh well, better luck next time.

If at first you don't succeed...

1 comment:

  1. When my mom's brother died in April, we chose not to tell her. My cousin is a Social Worker, she told me that she would forget why she's upset and would only remember the sad emotion. Mom was already out of it and living between worlds; it seemed like a good idea. I wonder if I made the right decision?

    I am sorry for Hubby's loss. it's tough to see them out of sorts and not be able to offer much help.

    You are in my thoughts. Big Hugs!

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